In Knowing Whats Best

The Vault

The Placing Of More Pieces

Who am I? A human being with good intent.
Who in this unpieced puzzle makes it quite content
Although kicking myself for my mistakes,
They’re jsut dead skin that peel from the scrape.

Lingering on what?? Is going to change what?
Mingling with what your heart and soul cought
Now thats something to strive for
Not what they call the Dazzling Galore,
Thats just cold cuts a$$ end of a boar,
A smile on loves face means something more.
Bringing that great vessel to shore,
After impact by the storms blood and gore,
A soul knocking on graces door,
Stranded in a life raft but up float the oars,
The hurt but DETERMINED, so he’ll make it to shore.

Firm Brief Message About Waking Up Tomorrow,
Picking up more pieces and not sulking in sorrow.

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Grade Given To A Frat Girl

Hang in there frat girl I bet you will make your grade,
If the finals taking off professors denim and suede
Whats done is done her degree was made.

Is sounds so cruel but its talk heard in elementary,
The actions made in schoolyards considered just evidentally
But these are sheer thoughts tangeting away from her class
University girl running away from her past
Long Island nce home is nw stepped on ash,
See those books aint her only whip lassh,
Party scenes at night the mornings a crash,
Her class in 5 minutes she sld her books for cash,
So she took the day off and killed off her stash
I get it this is your newlife better than the past,
A point inlife where what is made to last?

Frat girl leaving her loved ones behind,
Like we never existed in your time
You stated goo-bye in your action tobe gone
SO try justifying the fact you said forget us and moved on

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Just Spitting Up The Flem

If Saint Anthony is the Saint of the lost and found
Please help me find my heart I know its around
I am not dead so its not underground
And a hoe dont have it running around town,
Its in between my torso lost between the sound.

Oh My! that press called Ecstacy
Hid it read well like it wasnt left in me
But it showed me the doors just didnt give me the key
Just reassured myself that I am who is free
But I had to come down now the rest is on me
I dont need presses cause I have tree
This is In Knowing Whats Best & getting to know me
The world could be music and sweet poetry
But gotta stand up and feel the same hope in me.

The timeline never ends
But these elements I will make my friends
Though Sometimes I broke and bend
I never wanna bring a tragic end
Ill make right just spitting up the flem

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Cut Throat Transitional

Riddle me this, riddle me that!

Who on moving trains jumps off the tracks

Those holes in the wall fill every last crack

But that wall inside break it down

There was a time your feet were firm on ground

There was the time the day it didnt bring you down

Lately you’ve been coming out of full throttle

But dont take advantage of that burn in the bottle

Your mind has been to places past the stories of Aristotle

So why on yourself do you kick and waddle?

Yes you made mistakes but you can still salvage,

This is nothing but a string played made callus

You know the prolblem and its how to beigin

Though it might seem these chances are slim

The Blessed does forgive the sinners sin

Remember your not in this race to win

You run those laps to make your plump ass slim

Metaphorically speaking you see this is my soul

Sometimes surpasses my brain like you dont even know

And though it seems like im a disguise

Im just a soul with the choice to recognize

In my brain its set to soothe these cries

To make wrong right before I die

Think what you want this aint no lie

Just all my low and I know why

Thisaint bragging & sure isnt denial

Me stating this isnt the god damn final

You will see I will see one day will be different

I get lost in a motion confused in transition

Like a fat kid getting high in a kitchen

Athletes mussle starts to decay and stiffen

ANd No Cleary DEF NOT me bitchen.

Im gonna come back im gonna do right

I swear I think this every day and every night

Im gonna surcome this anger rage and spite

So this blueprint im drawing can be a litte more clear

Clarity in the clouds a refresed mind steers

 

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Staple This Post*It To My Brain

Note to self your better than this,

It isnt death its just a busted lip

That needs nothin more than time maybe a stitch

This is tme to do right and not be a stupid bitch

Now be the foundationfor te pouringbricks,

Instead of being broken like leaves, hay and sticks

Your gonna fall flat for these pricks?

Your better than that make the actions make that stick

Now im breaking away from my narrator

Coming 1st person to help tme this anger.

To help tame this psychosis ive grown to know

Just rebuild the aftermath and pause the show,

One its complete ill go back into flow

The red light changes and the green means go.

But there is a road and I already know

And there is my hope like you dont even know,

There is a faith and I can feel its glow,

And im gonna take off just lettig you know,

Kill the demon so I could let myself grow.

Ive taken beatings Ive taken the mental misery

Mixed thoughts and ideas sometimes conflict me,

Ive felt a hope stronger than ecstacy

But the pills wore off the hope never left me

The moon will light the night if in my head I am lost at sea

But I know I gotta push and the rest is up to me

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Recollection Of Myself

Pitch black in the morning, theres a person in the road

No! Just deleary of someone long ago,

Promises and plans but it was all such and so,

Delusions walked a different path, I rolled a different flow.

“Have We Met Before”

I bit on my lip I tasted my gore,

No response not even sure..

So close but distant memories of being a kid,

But this was all underneath my eyelids.

Cause I awoke on the road,

Freely highway bound always on the go,

Ride the highways to where ever they know.

Black top path at the end do you promise?,

Evert mile sign passed I think how bad I want this,

White lies along the way do they exit off to honest,

Might fuck up some smalls,but big I wont I promise.

Stop screaming your steps ahead of Hell,

And I take the time to recollect myself

Second touching these reminding feelings that I felt,

Metranome to the beat going inside myself.

Ambulance? No just an S.U.V.

On the highway in the middle of remaining trees,

Driving past the points of X,Y,Z

Far now started before A,B,C

But I exit to the right he disappears to the left of me,

And the sun is sweating a little further west of me,

All I remember before my eyes close,

Seratonin off pause now continue the show,

Closed eyed visuals continued the flow,

Recollecting myself like I dont even know.

Now the river is a mirror and Im staring down me,

But my reflection seems to breathe better than me,

And it let out a current that pulled right to the sea

Ripples just remain how could this be?

The third and final look is unclear to see,

But i’ll find these answers hidden inside of me.

So splash make me go invisible,

I know I am not fucking invincible.

But I know I am better than what is perceived,

There is a berathing soul living inside of me,

Reviving myself inside vivid poetry,

My constant reminder of this gracious hope in me,

And this isnt perfection I hope you can see,

Just enlightenment me getting to know me.

Its opening doors and not abusing ecstacy,

Let my life be filled with grace and empathy

I spoke out to the blessed now I speak out to myself,

Dont let your home burn to a living hell,

Barricade the meteorites with a platonic shell,

Dont feed in to this dirty glass that they sell,

Or $7 Fuckin 50 at Taco Bell,

Dont let yourself poison the drinking well,

Now your mind wont internally swell,

No more saying Ill see you in Hell,

Embraced the blessed now clenching myself

Then the illusion all around starts to wein,

But morals not forgot after stating its a dream

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

August Snowcone

For a moment paused again, time I could’ve grown,

But I played in the snow & now im a snow cone.

In the middle of the summer?? Did you catch my drift?

You shut the faucet off but it continues to drip,

Cant feel your own face numb to your fucking lips.

 

Like for a second I fed my insane,

& it opened a door, this fact in my brain,

& I know it just as well as my own damn name.

 

Stop feeling sorry, Stop being so pathetic,

Stop feeling the injection of a fuckin anesthetic.

Your better than that but not by much,

So start to break this beast like such,

Your legs aint broken stop using a crutch.

Yeah all of you! Go Ahead And Make A Fuss

Your nothing but blisters and your words are puss.

How many more people are going to try and break me?

How much more can I laugh, crack on my poetry,

You wont stop me from finding that hope in me,

Casted and set sail to the beauty of the sea.

Who the fuck am I I know im not perfect,

We could all be the same amount of worthless,

But not everybody dreams about reaching the surface

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Working Class Nobody

Just the small pieces in a big portrait 
Our own machines in our own fortress 
Each and every soul yearning to be somebody 
But at the end of the day were just working class nobodys 

Charlie as a kid used to pray to the angels 
But reality just proved him that the bible was a fable 
Now 20 years later off the books minimum wage 
Deteriorating from 18 hour days 
Child support and rent leave him no money 
And at the end of the day hes just a working class nobody 

Kristen as a girl was tortured and raped 
And spent her teenage years trying to find her place 
Till that one night she took a vial to the face 
And let the cocaine just take her place 
Rehab after rehab and she never recovered 
She only came out worse and fell more under 
An addiction to support but she couldnt keep a job 
So she did what she could and a bank she did rob 
Still no trial and held without bail 
Now what she calls home is the county jail 
She thought the coke made her a somebody 
But at the end of the day shes just a working class nobody 

Tony had it all faithful wife and loving kids 
And all the things he dreamed about when he was a kid 
Security around the gates of his kingdom 
7 8 figure paychecks such a wealthy income 
But he lost it all when the stock market crashed 
and he watched his whole world go from a flame to ash 
Now he sits in an alley all by himself 
With a vivid image of it all going to hell 
But its all a remanicence of when he used to be somebody 
But the world demoted him to a working class nobody 

The devil once was the words of a republican 
Who’d repeat himself over till the message sunk in 
So much protection never worried about assanation 
But Tony figure out the worlds confusing equation 
And blew a bullet into the politician 
But Tony was hit harder with a mental incision 
Tony proved his point if you are a somebody 
Dont take it for grantit cause your still a working class nobody 

Michael is religious of the bible he speaks 
Tried to make charlie a believer when his faith grew weak 
Then it happened leaving Sunday night mass 
4 shadows jumped and mugged him left him unconcious in the grass 
He awoke in a hospital out of touch with Christ 
With no more will and no more fight 
So much for faith creating him a somebody 
It was a few hard hits till he was a working class nobody 

Ben was an actor so lost in his greed 
Where everything he wants is right under his feet 
With a movie face he stole Kristens heart 
And like the coke he message just tore her apart 
His movies rewinded her to her start 
And brought her back to those moments in her uncles car 
But Ben fell off the face of the earth 
And a new generation of actors was given birth 
Ben saved nothing abd blew all his money 
And before he knew it he was a working class nobody 

Patrick joined a gang,United States Marines 
Cause defending his country as a kid was his dreams 
But the truth about the war was starting to come clean 
He would soon realize the militarys not what it seems 
Coming home from Iraq 
Never wanting to go back 
But in the mail came that note 
Assigned back to base and his families heart broke 
But he had no choice cause the system spoke 
And dont dare take any of this as a joke 
Dont ask to get out of it cause the answer is no! 
He was all he could be ,a soldier ,a somebody 
But to the world and world war 3 hes just a working class nobody 

Melissa has it good has everything she wants 
But she penetrated my head and now she taunts 
Shes blowing 65 life in the fast lane 
As shes leaves her past and alot of ex boyfriends in pain 
But even though she pushes to be something 
In the big picture it doesnt amount to nothing 
But she swears shes on her way off to be somebody 
To the world and beyond shes a working class nobody 

Im a lost soul,the past she left behind 
So done with shedding tears for the past times 
So spill it all out in this poetic mess 
And I only write what I feel and what I know is best 
A form of therapy letting it of my chest 
and plotting what actions is best to take next 
I write this for the girl for the system for the souls that made me bleed 
To show im gonna stand back up balanced on my feet 
This isnt a matter of difference cause were all the same 
So stop giving the same blood the blame 
Cause thats the same blood that carresses the pain 
Were all the same all striving to be something 
But I’ve come to terms with im a working class nothing 
If only the world could see were all the same 
Then finally the world would see some form of change 
But then its devoured by people who say its insane 
No one ever thinkgs to give it that chance 
So they all stay striving like carpenter ants 
I wont be fooled by this delusional world, 
By politics religion or that backstabbing girl 
Everyones on this quest to try and be somebody 
But in the big picture were just working class nobodys 
Were all the same small pieces that make the portrait 
Our own machines in our own fortress 
I know my father always wanted me to be somebody 
But im just like the rest a small piece working class nobody

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Humor: Me Taking Some Credit Cause I Took All The Blame

Enough of my misery time to make myself laugh,

Like a pyro horny with his matches and gas,

Or a kid jumping in a puddle…Spash!,

A soothing ointment for an itchy rash,

Or a pothead smoking some really good hash,

Better than the best of the drug dealers stash.

Or how about a sumo wrestler Jump and JIGGLE,

Or self depressed chumps with themselves they fiddle,

ha! Im the Riddler and here is a riddle.

A puppet Master cutting his puppets strings,

A bird its first time sprouting its wings,

The world moving from Google to Bing,

A monotone fool grows a lung to sing,

A string player redesigning 6 strings,

Or the fake,the plastic wearing prosthetic rings,

Allergic and you still get a bee sting,

Your turn in show-and-tell what did you bring?

A monkey holding terd and now he will fling,

These are a few of my favorite things.

Julie Andrews, No! The sound of music Yes!,

Or the feelings from pink and blue press,

I caused my high school so much stress,

are you staring at every chicks breasts,

But with all this no incest!

Say fuck Christ but love the blessed,

Guessing every answer on your final test,

Letting some humor out of my chest!

You have a mouse problem,

I’ll leave food for that pest.

Your mothers family portrait, I draw a dick and some breast,

If your father calls your house I’ll say you moved out west,

Then motorboat a chick with no chest,

Its bombs not bullets for her bulletproof vest,

Its saying Fuck to some and Cunt to the rest.

I am sorry to vent my disgusting brain 

But due to my past my presents insane,

Every once in a while I share the stain,

That comes from a mind Acid cut w cocaine,

And my countless other flights on a jet plane,

But I laugh cause its a lion and his maine,

Shows im not on the tracks I ride the train

Its still seeing beauty like a lake and a craine

a little construction with a wrecking ball crane 

Its expression till my brain is drained,

Me taking some credit cause I took all the blame

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Chlorine Clouds The Colour
Chlorine clouds the colour on your favorite shirt,
Scoring sounds her thunder, & demises your worth.
But its nothing more than an internal bruise
Whiting out mistakes but reminding black and blues.

She holds the strings controlling what you do,
And after getting the shot she still gives the flu,
But the grass is still green and the sky still blue,
And as for me boy, Im still a brother to you.

Detoxing with you, the futures hidden behind a cloud,
So whats not there is going to bring you down?

I see whats in front of my eyes,
& I know she comes to with surprise,
Though love was the only thing she implied,
And betrayal was the only pressure applied,
Just reincarnaton to after you died.

And brother the music we will make will be the medicine
Not the temporary relief of vicodin
That second long feeling, sobrietys a spin.

But the words you right are so sincere
Your just a little fuzzy from the benzos and beer,
This sounds like resolutions for the new year,
But its just me stating break your anger and fear,
Cause only you in your life were meant to steer.

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                       
Never Giving Up
On the night of the accident the medic filed
Just a 5 year old boy toyed by a pedaphile
But beauty is seeing the kid reconcile

Not loosing himself for what a monster did
As he seals a mason jar double cheking the lid
But the glass still broke after all that he did,
I ask with your self how do you live?

Were all running different but in the same place
We all do good We all make mistakes
If I say I didnt I’d be talking out of place
You touch a boy? you should DIE in outer space
People screw up but inhumain is just being a waste
Alive be buried in a 6×6 case.

But the boy who cried a river down his cheeks,
I feel your pain and to you I speak
Dont feel less and dont feel weak
Dont feel mistrust dont feel meak
Dont live out his disease
Cause your better than that scum sleeze
Who only hurt you cause hes shaking on his knees
And doesnt know manners so he doesnt know please
Hes just a cinder block submarining under sea
I know the damage it wont be a breeze
But what does it catch your face and trees leaves
The car will start once you find the keys
The cut will scab no longer you bleed
Erase that moment so you no longer grieve
I know you wanna feel the prosperity.

 
 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Pluto Is A Planet…Jackass
I tell myself over, over, and over again
Make yourself 12 on a 1 thru 10
Dont give up never stop on trying
Just scrapes and scabs your not dying

Pick the pieces up put a smile on your face
Make sugar & cinamon from so called toxic waste

Vultures Circling? Make them doves swaying
To the sea of stars I watch on the ground just laying.

Yes my head saturned between a noose
But I somehow manage to get myself loose
So Saturn has its rings in the sky for I shoot
The sky I dreamed of in a carriage as a youth
Pluto is a planet thats the straight up truth
& with all 9 in my head I play Duck Duck Goose
But im bored with this pattern time to let loose.

Kick myself in the a$$ at least out of the chair
Splash water in my face & pull myself by the hair
Show outside how much your in really cares

Show them how bad I want to see this breathing soul
As if its diamond from what once was coal
Lifes acapella to taking back control
Not a flag blowing half mass on a 10 foot pole

You cant change the solar system just yourself god dammit
Warding off wrong doing Protest to ban it
And the last I left off Pluto IS a Planet!

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Soothe This Screaming Soul With The Rhthym Of My Heart
Words have a voice and I’ve felt the impact

But took a few wrong turns in the face I got smacked

I just let myself go out of whack,

But now I have all the pieces to put back on track

And now  I will hold it even if it breaks my back

What am I? I am only human

But this plant has a flower and it started bloomin,

Sometimes thats paused when the feeling starts brewing

I appear so psychotic sometimes come off hoarse

But for what I have done I have remorse

And yes Ill admit that im quite lost

I hate feeling nailed to this God Damn Cross

In my head on and on this will go

Never once forgot never once said so

Im far from a junkie wont let myself be a hoe

Sometimes I fall far off track but I wont let myself go

I have aot to learn with it I will grow

In my actions and around it all will show

“Life Is Beautiful” but you have to grasp the glow

& I have this hope like you dont even know.

I climbed a cliff and then jumped off,

Put my state in somewhat of a pause

But I ridded the lines threw out the straws.

Im coming back because this is not over

Just a last second finding of a blood donor

This isnt the end the beginning my friend

Maybe not now but soon you’ll comprehend

By the grace of an angel sitting on a cloud,

it kept my soul screaming rather loud

Then there are moments where I wont make a sound

But I want to live life with my feet on the ground

And I want to bring my loved ones around

I want you to see the grace of my heart,

I want to build I dont want to rip apart.

Now is the time to grasp this beautiful,

I know this purpoe is something more meaningful

So tomorrow I wake with a clarity head

Shake my self out this god damn bed.

Start building whats broken start fixing myself,

It wont be over night but one day all will be well.

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
On A Napkin In My Pocket (28 Bars)
It was done once before that is breaking habbits

Training an animal that has gone rabbid.

Could this be done? I thought it was impossible,

Never say never & never have I spoke more logical

Cause only you can stop you from being unstopable

Dont let no one tell you the sky is not possible

Cause Ive seen the ill survive without them seeing a hospital

Faith and motive is sometimes more than logical

And if you dont want to take a second to believe

Then stuck minded arrogance is what you’ll perceive

Not looking at a plant that was a still born seed

Loosing thoughts in some sick delerious greed

Your characters to me they do not decieve

Yes Im high it was great tree

And this is the truth written from the inside of me

Then its read by fools who call it “just poetry”

And theyll never open up so they will never really see

Sometimes there are doors and these words are the key

That leads you to the ocean sail on a calm sea

or mustard gas in words that will make you internally bleed

F**K you I dont care cause this is my hope in me

Bit the curb to many times now so you see

I used to spill blood no longer I bleed

Cause I write it all down and make poetry

Surgery? Come and try to open up me

Your urgent plea? see if I attend thee

Plastic and paper your just pretend to me

You blew your chance so you wont ammend with me.

 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Pour Me Another Drink
its about to get vicious

im about toget twisted

its saying no to the draft that they say i am listed

setting motive to a mind and mind to a mission

you can say all you want god damn you’ll still listen

im the shark you caught tuna fishin

and no this firmly aint me bitchen

this is me giving back there gift of infliction

im climbing out of a hole fighting winds of affliction

not living life by a black magic superstition

Seperating wit from an all might wisdom

Now let me put a little more than smarts in them

Who am I? just a wolf ascending

Not looking at mistakes to be the ending

Reflection meets is eye and I start to convulse

Soul acting on a sheer impulse

But a feelings something deep, habits always want more

I still vision the sun though the sky pours

but its straight in a glass simply stated a drink

this is sparking friction coming from the soul of my ink

Physical addiction my anchor heart starts to sink

adrenaline of hope seconds after a blink

Hit by D-Day now all orientals are chinks

Do you catch my drift Im filled with metaphors

Suck in a hallway with a couple dozen doors

With a coule dozen people in one gigantic circle

But everyones walls put them in a hurdle

A high chair a bib a crib and a gurdle.

Now staring at myself I get this drafty chill,

an angel showing God that he coul pop a pill

The second before the blesseds tears spill

His wings break off an his pulse goes still

The devil is ancy staring out the window sill

The angel spits up coming down to a will

A demon growing sick to the curing ill

Moments of misery becomethe outsiders fill

A crackhead whose calmed by nothin but crill

But the world keeps turning time never holds still

They look at the world and call it in recesion

I look at myself and call it manic depression

But with these elements I have this obsession

One day ill find the true value of this message

One day close my eyes and let a deep breath in

Not drowning from the drink that caused a spin

Grace and beauty Ill finally let in

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
The Fish Are Flying & The Birds Are Swimming
Transition me to a beach, fly me to an island

Im sick of screaming in anger, tired of drowning in crying

And I know my actions isnt called half of trying

Just a quarter alive, the rest 3 quarters dying.

I ask myself why is the blade cutting my throat,

Im trying to hold still as tidal waves smack my boat

But its winter air beating a durable winter coat,

The only source of heats from a drink and a line of coke

Whats called ending the night on a good note.

But the morning hangover death of will for the insecure doubt

Unlike jerking off you cant rub this out.

Its called time its known as patience,

Looking at the blueprinted path it just needs a little maintence

Instead of flushing it down or tossing it out,

Cause I dream about living on a cloud,

Where clarity is played by angels

theres no ripping it down

just placing puzzle pieces of this unpieced town,

Black clouds fall under into the seas they drown,

And nothing but smoke will rise from the sound,

But the nightmares over as we stand on damp ground

 
 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Pollygraphs & Percocet
Layed down on a matress with a lit cigarette

Melt into the comfort the beds a percocet.

You see this once meant a hostile dopeamine

The lost soul of an angst filled teen,

Who a thousand times over was struck o the spleen

Now he’s looking at life trying to adore her,

Sometimes looking for answers in Euphoria

So one day on life it wont pour on her.

The air becomes open the atmosphere settles,

Slow motion takes affect and nerves no longer wrestle,

Now its nothing but a single drop on a pedal,

On a rose that floated on to where??

It was all just illusion underneath my hair,

Next thing I know im stuck in a stare,

My vision doubles up in my crazy glue glare,

And my breathing body becomes one with the air,

Start to see the light the S.O.S. of a flare,

When your one with the skies do you ammend this light?

Dont abuse these frequent flyer nights.

Summers coming to its close,

Time to change into warmer clothes.

Now time to expand what is known.

 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Talking To The Blessed
I think to myself but my brain is being strained,

pasta in a bowl till all the waters drained,

Mixed emotion love, hate, grace, and pain,

Is it reaching for the sky or falling from a plane?

Is it irrational or is this speaking sane.

Blessed please help kill this burden on my brain.

Please I beg you! This is Epileptic Deja Vu,

The main characters me and I am you.

Third person speaking Im a narrator,

And I need help taming this beast like gator.

I could say I do but you know I dont hate her,

I can scream disappear but you know I cant fade her,

Life could be a bitch but you know I cant waste her.

So this is me talking, speaking out to you

Throw me any challenge, please let me see it through,

Once I was injections and kids with the flu,

But since then a little I somewhat grew.

But its a long way to go

and I hope what im walking is the right flow,

Cause it feels so right you dont even know

And Blessed right now I go underoath,

No more I want to hang from a rope,

I know im not perfect but im far away from dope,

Cause now I filled my heart with a little hope,

No more on my impulse do I try to scope..

So my prayer to you will come in a cue,

Your love is the antidote for my flu.

“Hail Mary Your Full Of Grace,

My soul is with the,

its your heart of gold and precious purity,

A stable ending of an insecurity,

Help me hold together what evers left in me

Help me bring out whats really best in me,

Dont let me float off to the depths of the sea,

Im finding new doors please help me find the key.

And I will keep striving for that happy end,

That being said Goodnight and Amen

 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
 
Natural Disaster & Happily Ever After
Did you think I wouldnt hear? Or that I’d never find out,

I wait for you to kill my fear, but every day is filled with doubt,

Sometimes I feel my heart is turned inside out..

But other times I feel the love packaged in kisses and laughter,

Once upon a time turns to happilly ever after,

Which is still seeing beauty in a natural disaster.

I see the beauty in the most hostile hurricane,

The wind blows it over and the land is clean by rain,

Now a fresh start again, but its unforgotten pain.

I see the lesson in thunder and lightning,

Just 2 lovers carelessly fighting,

They’re feelings dont mean but the actions are spiting.

Will it prevent you to push on trying?

Neither win lightning or thunder,

Cause the blue comes back and the gray falls under,

Now a vibe on the beach in the middle of summer.

She comes she goes quick and sharp like a twister,

Damages & Destroys pusses me like a blister.

Then they eloped and I still loved her

Then she left and I still missed her.

She had me feeling like some rotten potatoe,

On a field in a farm bombed by a tornado.

Does the past make a present feel like a fail,

And your in open territory being struck by hail,

Does the outside world feel like the county jail,

& Holidays feel like your out on bail.

Want to hop in the ship cast and set sail?

Or will you let tidal waves hold you back,

Like a junkie who wont feel nothing but smack,

the biggest regret try taking it back,

Taking a shortcut & never finding the track,

Speak stupidity and pat yourself on the back,

Equal rights but not allowed cause he’s black

Now I said so much the tsunami SMACKS,

Your boat to pieces where is your life raft,

Did it deflate from broken glass?

Now your stuck in the ocean and the currents pulling fast,

Take a deep breath cause it might be your last.

Then you will remain graved at sea,

Your body will sink but your soul will go free,

And float to the heart of none but she,

And he’ll become nothing but a memory

 
 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Untitled Caus Baby Didn’t Want To Name It.
Cotton clouds in the sky, whats it mean to you?

Natures simple beauty but you dont have a clue.

Simplistic Description with sunrays of wisdom.

Rivers and ponds with life in them,

And a flower stood tall held by a breathing stem,

Surrounded by others who breathe just like them,

Nobody asks who, how, why, or when?

Pure 24 Karots with a dazzeling gem,

An artist shedding feelings on a paper from a pen,

Mom patting here infants back till he spits up all the flem,

A sudden miracle killing off a tragic end.

Grace and Beauty, do you comprehend?

Living life to be content and amend?

Do you look at the elements like they’re your friend

Or are you a nothing “no it all” bringing in a tragic end?

Earth and her nature do you like to break and bend,

Cause Grace and Beauty You Do Not Comprehend

                                                                                                                                                                                                           
“Do You Remember?”
Do you remember, Cause I try to forget,
And the ash burned to the butt of a cigarette,
Just like the love in us when with him she met,
And you got mad that me and my friends made bets?
Do you remember the sunsets?

Cause I forgot those nights,\
Seemed to farfetched,Something didnt seem right.
But it pushed on despite,
Your in another bed Im on a frequent flyer night.

Your wrapped in someones arms, Im tangled in thorns
Belly feelings sound alarms, alert sirens and horns,
I wanted love but he just scores,
No longer will my life be a** end of a boar,
All for a naive disgusting but anoxic W****
Now shes in a life raft several miles from shore,
And I drink to the thought cause I dont care anymore.

So you ask “Do I remember?”
I forgot that we were even together,
It was covered up by foggy weather,
You swore all that time it would get better,
But you kept looking for who made you wetter,
Move on to the next comapre who is better,
Probably dont know cause half you dont remember.

“Your drunk I can smell the booze on your breath,
Glassy Eyes and a pale face covered in sweat!”
Then I just killed the bottle and flicked the cigarette

                                                                                                                                                                                                           
SOMETIMES
Sometimes I wonder what she hides beneath her eyes.
Lies disguised in smiles but her insides really cry?
Or is the truth just covered by her lucious hazel eyes.
Was I worth anything? Did you want us to die?

But then sometimes I think Im the blame for the pain,
But shes the reason I knotted with heroin and cocaine,
Shes the reason this mind went strung out insane.

Sometimes she has me think sex is just a game,
Like she loved me she loved him just the same,
Now she put a minefield in the midst of my brain.
But there is always the man who seeds the baby in the mother,
But the sacraments such stress its relieved with another,
Now his baby boy has a new half brother.
But thats not business its just a common factor,
Here in America reproduction could be a fracture.

Sometimes I feel the sun wont shine on me,
Its just a non stop thunderstorm raging inside of me,
Nothing but a dud in a dingey lost out in the sea,
Or like im sugar fitting in with unsweetened tea,
Or too much liquor flipping inside of me,
But theres still the jump to oppurtunity,
Then sometimes its all let out on looseleaf.

Sometimes I stem the leaves all the way to there roots,
Way past the point before it went cahoots,
Even passed the time I sat in moms belly bored,
Before I saw life before I was brought to shore,
Was there ever a moment the rich werent better than the poor?
Was there ever a difference between a woman and a Whore?
Besides on on the corner the other name brand stores?

You see sometimes people talk to pat themselves on the back,
In carried out conversations common sense is whats lacked,
But they go on like they just killed the rest of the crack,
More tangents than a timeline the sense is not coming back,
How many days have you been up? you should really hit the sack.

Sometimes a scapegoat is a mans best friend,
But I’ll keep my loyalty it will stay with me till the end,
One moral I’d never break or bend,
I wont cooporate cause they’re system I dont comprehend,
Its nothing but a zoo it fails its amends,
The man in the badge will never be your friend .
Sp this knowledge I know with them Ill never share,
its all in my head but to them its thin air.

Sometimes a judge remands a rehab,
Better than the prision so the suspect is glad.
But on release date its right back to the streets,
paranoia that makes you toss and turn under sheets.

The detox is now over now return to the world,
The drugs heal the sober once they puzzle with that girl,
So now her memory is nothing but body highs and intense colour swirls.

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           
This Verbal Battle
 
With the whites of eyes this verbal war goes on.
We are planes, Her actions and my words make bombs
And everything between us is bullets and guns,
Explosions that just might reach the sun,
And bring it all back to where it begun.

See your ease of pain is sleeping with guys,
While mine is writing and getting fuckin high
At moments I think is it worth to try,
Your my Eulogy you want me to die

                                                                                                                                                                                                           
Where To Go When The Thorns Over Grow The Stairs?
 
Walk the path, keep going foward,
The narrow windey road must go toward,
Must go toward something but where I dont know.
Dont know where you’ll take me but I’ll continue to go.
So ill light up a smoke & take in natures show.

Euphoric rest stop, great place to get high,
Away from that urban carbon monixide,
Away from that spotlight of a city sky,
So close to existance but out of sight,
Stroll through the park in a Douglaston night.

“The Revolution Is Coming” thats what the side walk wrote,
Written by someone who grew the balls and spoke.
But what did it mean? This I did not know,
But I kept it in mind and continued to go.

The path became muddy and nature’s closing in,
The temperature drops & the air becomes thin,
But up ahead looks to be a little clear,
No..Just a stone road..Hasnt been walked in years.

The vines grow over broken cinder blocks,
Like a common street bum with holes in his socks,
Half buried in the ground, mistaken for rocks,
A spot in the world where the clock just stopped.

To the left stone stairs halfway down disappear,
Vines and thorns havent been trimmed in years.
Is this what it meant? “The Revolution is coming?”
Subliminal nature hints or am I just bugging??

And theres no way to go from here,
The next thing you know, you waste all those years,
And you’ll come to find out the road ends here.

 
                                                                                                                                                                                                           
A Bible
A bilbe sits on my desk for what reasons I dont Know,
I read that Bitch from front to back then I let my faith go.

The Gunshot! Now with the flow,
To where it doesnt even know,
The unknown tracing back to history
Piece together yourself solve the mystery
I could feel a Fuckin faith in every Fuckin inch of me

I could feel above but I dont think its Heaven
And I step on below there is no Hell,
people shoot guns soldiers are dead men
But politics is all a joke the truth they’ll never tell,
They’ll leave god to save you all from burning in Hell.

Ok! Really think so?
Take a second thought then let your mind go,
The answers will come just enjoy the show.

Dont call it athiest Cause I do believe,
Cause a plant did sprout from a still born seed,
But history to me does not decieve
I see men today give in to they’re greed,
Money is the apple & they’re Adam and Eve,
I watch wars Kill, Profile, And seperate,
Nuclear Power Determines fate,
And I read God Let 3 Generations Waste,
All cause one made a minor mistake.

The old testament theres your proof,
Dont take my Words as  a Fuckin spoof,
This is eyes in the bible Gods honest truth,
That I just spilled me a bum ass youth.

Constructing new styles for In Knowing Whats Best
I promise I share more beneath my chest,
I have the blessed mother Im considered Blessed,
Time To take a break Ill be back with the rest.

                                                                                                                                                                                                           
 
PHONE SEX WITH DEAF CHICKS
Hey baby ive been around. But all in all do I have you aroused?
How could I be aroused when im always caught feeling down,
and your getting around, yeah tell him “pin me to the ground”,
Then Fuck his brains out making all sorts of sounds,
Then do it all again all over the town,
Oh yeah im a seagull flying over the sound,
Nope just the bleeding and your the bloodhound,
Tried to keep it in but you pushed us out of bounds,
So I write us all down and make words that astound,
At moments I know your throwing yourself around,
When I know again you scream as you tell him to pound,
But one day you’ll pick from fields and I will wear my crown,
And my crown is my pride which I just wont let down,
For me cinder blocks, but a circus for the town.

For them a million covers the fact they have no dicks,
But a million folds under when you have no wit,
Go ahead fool around catch disease from there dicks
then come to me it will be phone sex with deaf chicks.
Ask if im aroused? Ill say you make me sick,
Sorry im a man & you wont disease my dick
And mental misery on me you wont afflict,
Then you make me veinless and my body obtains drips,
Jumping ten grades higher than just bong hits,
This is wont get to so a bong is what ill hit,
Making sure on me no more pain you inflict,
So go ahead and jump from dick to dick,
I promise my next one wont be like this,
Just had to vent cause I was getting sick,
But theres some parts of the brain that you cant fix,
So as long as you hoe and you hope from dick to Dick,
Better belive im having phone sex with deaf chicks

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Look Out Into the Bay, You Could See The Future

Paintbrushes paint a 9:30 sky,
Theres ripples in the bay so the wind cant hide,
Sat glued to beyond as I felt a great high.
At times like these I’d wonder why?
But boy morning is so gorgeous they do not lie,
But I looked up again and let out a sigh,
Killed the engine and let my window go blind,
Cotton candy clouds coloured in a bind,
Sky meets water and relfections collide

Then I came to terms with this world is blind,
Cause I looked around and Im the only one on the ride 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

FORMAL INTRODUCTION

I want to take the time to give a formal introduction,
So you will see this is more than poetic construction,
Way beyond the moments where I couldnt function,
It was so magnetic I felt the suction,

I felt the pull, I layed on the floor,
Couldnt move my eyes glued to the door,
Sweat tearing out of all my pours,
My own brain couldnt take the pain anymore,
And like seashells I floated to shore,
And my soul is in the midst of this hailing war,
But I still wake up after all that I saw,
I once took life and I Fucked it raw,
But now I look back to correct the flaws,
Now a monster slowly silencing his roar,
And Christ went to bed in a stable of straw,

Now I look all directions for something more

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